Yeah, so I guess Mother's Day is coming up soon cause I'm seeing gift guides and lists of "Top Ten Things Mom Needs This Mother's Day", and I will say - the majority of these lists are bullsh*t. As a mother, there are certain things I crave more than anything and of those things, almost none of them show up on these lists.
So I thought I would make a list of my own - but a REAL list, not some bullsh*t list that takes all the guesswork out of trying to find something for Mom that she doesn't ACTUALLY want.
1. You Do It
Listen, those little coupon booklets you get for your mom, they're cute and all, but if you're not going to actually do it, then don't even bother.
How about instead of spending hours drawing cute little pictures and perfecting your block lettering on those tiny papers, why not just do it. Don't give her some book that promises to do the dishes, or wash a load of laundry, or make supper one night, because we all know that once Mother's Day has come and gone and Mom asks you to take out the garbage, she will have to endure 10 minutes of whining and stomping before it gets done. So skip the silly little coupon booklet and spend the day doing the things you were going to put in the coupon booklet. Don't make a booklet - save trees.
2. Sleep
OK, so I know it's become, like, this weird tradition where Dad and the little kids wake up quietly, creep downstairs, make breakfast and come back up with a tray of warm, delicious breakfast food complete with steaming hot coffee and a single flower in a tiny vase, but like....
Please. If I'm not awake, don't wake me up! What is wrong with you!? It's Mother's Day!
But, seriously, in all honesty, if Mom is generally not a morning riser (yes, there are insane people out there who prefer to get up at the crack of dawn), DON'T WAKE HER UP. Wait until she wakes up on her own (even if it's noon) and then make her breakfast. You can even send her back to bed when it's done being cooked. Breakfast in bed doesn't have to be a surprise, in fact, I'll let you in on a little secret: She knows! While you're down in the kitchen with your dad and your sister, she can hear all the cupboards banging, the squabbling, the oven opening and closing...she's just lying there at this point, waiting for you to come in so you won't be disappointed. Which means, it's not even 9 am on Mother's Day and already she's catering to you and not worrying about herself.
Instead, let her watch you and your siblings - and your dad - make breakfast. Watching everyone freak out in the kitchen and fussing over her breakfast would be a lot more satisfying then lying in bed wondering what kind of mess she's going to "wake up" to and have to clean up afterwards.
3. Peace and Quiet
Whether your realize it or not, you ask Mom for a lot. Like, constantly. And most of the time it probably doesn't bother her - after all, you're her kid and she probably likes doing things for you....sometimes. But getting up when she just sat down, for the 4th time, to get you something to drink probably isn't one of them, neither is breaking up the fight you're having with your brother over the stupid piece of Lego you have 100 of, or racing up the stairs to an urgent call for help when, really, you could have found your socks if you'd just used your eyes!
So, although she would love nothing more than to spend Mother's Day with the spawn who made her a mother, it would be nice if she could do it in peace. For one day, leave her alone. Get your own juice, make your own snack, settle your fight with your brother or take it elsewhere. For one day, let her just sit around the house and enjoy her family. Maybe you could even get her a drink (preferably wine).
4. An afternoon of...nothing
Yeah, so it's become a thing where Moms like spas - well, that's what everyone thinks. I mean, don't get me wrong - a day at the spa getting completely pampered sounds nice...in thought. But think about it this way - she's spending all day in a strange place, in a bathrobe that doesn't belong to her, walking on cold tile, sitting in stupid chairs that look nice but don't feel nice, and getting fondled by multiple strangers.
What Mom would really like is a relaxing day AT HOME. After she's watched you make breakfast, and then watched Dad clean the kitchen, give her a book. Tell her you and your siblings are going downstairs to watch a movie and she can take the whole afternoon to read, take a bath while she reads, have a tea while she reads...and then also do #3.
There is nothing like being in the comfort of your own home doing the things you crave doing but can't because you have screaming kids around you all the time. Personally, that's the biggest thing I miss from before my son was born - sitting in my reading chair, with nice music, a hot tea, QUIET, and reading my book. Ahhhhh. Serenity.
5. Get out
OK, so, I get that Mother's Day is about being a mom, and that she should want to spend every waking moment reveling in this fact. But I'll let you in on one more secret: We spend our every waking moment thinking about you, wondering about you, worrying about you, doing things for you, spending time with you....whether you realize it or not. And although your mother loves you more than life itself, sometimes, she just wants you to get the hell out. Ask your dad to take you and your siblings to the park, or to a movie, and...Leave. Mom. Alone. After you've cleaned the house, allowed her to sleep in, got her a drink, gave her a book, LEAVE. For like...at least...three hours. Maybe even turn on her favourite music and light some candles, and then quietly leave the house.
And then when you get back, you can have a snuggle-fest on the couch, tell her how much you love her, and sit down as a family and eat the supper Dad made (or ordered).
THAT'S how you can give your mom the best Mother's Day ever. And if you ask any mom you know, I bet you, with some prodding, she would be more than happy to agree with me. Mom's are born nurturers; if you're there, she will do everything she can to ensure you're happiness - so do her a favour - don't be there! And she will be even happier when you come back!
______________________________________________________________________________
Cover Image Photo Credit: Jonathan Rolande.
コメント